Practice at Ashtanga Yoga Bangkok Center

I am always very shy when I start practicing in a new shala.

Even though everyone is practicing at their own pace, when you have to unfold your mat in between two practitioners, there is that particular moment during which you'll ask yourself "Do I have the right to be there?"..... the answer is yes absolutely!

When you enter a new shala, you will have to follow the rules that are in this place. I have seen some students being stopped for their first time, even thought their teacher don't tell them. Teaching might changed from one shala to another.

Some teacher will give you a lot of postures, that is what happened to me when I was in Greece, while other won't give you anything at all.

It is important to keep an open mind.

As for me, I did my "come back" this morning.

After 4 days of half practice due to my elbow injury, this morning was surprisedly over all expectations.

Boonchu Tantikarum (Level 2 authorised teacher) came on my mat while I was preparing the drop back.

I directly told him I was not really thinking of doing them, and explain him how last week I hurt my elbow while dropping back. As a conclusion I told him I was scared to do it again.
He looked at me and asked "Can you come back up from it?", I told him "No". Then he said "We'll start from here, go in Urdhva Danurasana".

I laughed. In my perfect world, of course I want to be able to come back up first and then drop back like nothing. But the reality is totally different.

I told him: "Well, it's not gonna happen"....... on what he replied "Just give a try".

From my mat, I came into urdhva Danurasana. He then told me to swing front and back and at the third time to come back up. He placed his hands right behind the thighs, without really touching them, but with a fraction of movement pulling me forward gently, I came back without any problem.
"See, its possible.... do it again"...

Came back in Urdhva Danurasana. This time he said "You will swing front and back four times, then on the fifth one you come back up". I did four swings front and back, and then from the fifth one I stood up.... I laughed and said "yeah, you did help me, I felt your hands behind my legs", he replied "they were just there, but not doing anything"....

For the third time he looked at me "This time you'll swing and at one point, I won't tell you when, I might help you to come up. Let's play that game"...

I came back up from the second swing. On my way up I was really on my own, feeling the all body working, stretching, pulling, breathing, organically coming from the inside like I never ever felt before.

He looked at me and said "Do it again". I've done it six to seven times.

Then he said "Tomorrow will practice again, that's it for today".

Mental blocks are also physical (most of the time they are)

I know it, I do believe it, still I am not capable of integrating it into my day to day life.

Last week, when I thought my left elbow was completely gone because it did not unfold while dropping back, instead of telling me "I think you should stop practicing for a while", Iain told me "Come back tomorrow morning for the led class, and I will tell you how to practice".

Today when I said to Boonchu, I can't do drop back because of my left elbow, he did not even look at it. He said "your mental is playing with you".

Therefore I came back reading Iain's blog. Where he really talked about it : Iain Grysak blog.

I won't be lying by saying that my practices are having a direct influence, impact toward my thought, my desire, my goals, my personal development. By claiming that, some people can think it is putting too much pressure into the practice. However it is the truth.

Trupta is the first to say, when I am not practicing, I am unbearable.

Last month, one student asked me my recommendation after the course.

Was it to take a couple of days off, or should the practice go on?

At first I did not really understood the question, why would you want to stop practicing while this month was all about to learn how to practice on your own, to develop a personal practice, and to become fully autonomous.

One month of practice is nothing, barely the body start understanding the process of movement, why would you like to stop in order to give a break? I told her, better to continue, it was just the beginning of it.

That is inaction, the fact of not doing anything that kill the body and the mind.

Four weeks of practice is substantial but technically there is nothing extraordinary to it. Once you understand it takes at least twelve months, of a regular practice, for the body to integrate one asana, the breathing, the placement and start being comfortable into the pose.

I would add four weeks of practice is just the appetiser and the road is still very long.

Is the pianist stop performing scales after a month of it? I don't think so. Only the practice can improve the ability and the understanding of what and why we are doing it.

The connection between the Teacher and the student

In the Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga practice, this connection is pretty strong.

The first time I practiced with Iain, I came with all my ego and more of it. Harder was the downfall.
I first got sick, then pissed off. Second time, I fully gave up myself, and relied on him, whatever he said, asked to do, I was willing to do it. Since then, I won't ever judge, discuss anything he will say to me, I will just do.

All teachers I am meeting are very important to me. They all bring new perspectives on my personal practice as well on my personal development.

Being able to connect to the Inner "me"

Unfortunately I can't really talk about it. I would love to be fully connected and in accordance of what I think, do, talk, desire. However it is not happening yet.

I said things but when it is time to apply in my day today life, I do the contrary because I am still scared of what I am capable of doing.

However, I do believe Yoga is a tool to it.

Never give up, keep practicing.

Namaste,

Ashtanga yoga loosing the practice

Is it possible to loose the practice, completely?

My body is different.

I don't recognise it.

How can it have changed so much is such a short time?

It takes so much time and commitment to build a practice, but as soon as you stop the daily practice, it is finished... how is it possible???

Here is my Marichyasana D from April 2018 :

At that time I was able to twist and to grab the wrist.

Then from September to October I kind of stop the practice on a daily basis. Honestly speaking I did practice maybe 6 times on the last 2 months, other than that I was practicing my own flow, doing whatever felt good for me.

Now that I am coming back to my daily Mysore practice, I have lost Marichyasana D on the right side..... the left side was difficult to twist thought...... AND of the top of it, I have lost Supta Kurmasana....

Not to mention that Janu Shirshasana C on the left side is not possible anymore.

Hopefully my body will react on a positive way, at one point I can not regress more in my practice, or can I?

Will see tomorrow morning.....

Namaste,

Ashtanga Yoga Ubud - The Seeds of Life

So happy to be back on my mat. After 6 months in Europe I kind of lost my practice.

The practice in Greece was great with Kristina Karitinou but since September I had problems going back on the mat.

I realised that my body was meant to practice under tropical weather. Whatever we said, practicing Ashtanga Yoga with a humid and hot weather is definitely the best thing to do. 

The body response is completely different, the sweat is there and muscles are very happy.

Of course I am back to practice under the guidance of Iain Grysak. I have to admit yesterday when I joined the led class I was slightly ashamed as my body has changed since last time I was there.

I gained 4 kilos, all on my hips, therefore I can not bind anymore in Supta Kurmasana. Yes size makes the difference.

When hips are wider is it way more difficult to bind, that is so obvious.

Outside of it, I found more and more important to commit to the practice with one teacher and only one.

Lately I have been practicing with different teachers, with all respect to them, they did not have that much of knowledge or maybe it was not suitable for me.

In France there is not a lot of good teachers, to my personal opinion. And the practice is so different, atmosphere is different as well.

I have received an awful adjustment from a teacher, which wake up my sit bone pain. It was so bad that I could not practice anything for at least 3 weeks.

When you start practicing with one teacher, and you talked to him, then he will understand what are your possibilities and will notice good days from bad days.

We can not have the same practice daily, some days are harder than others, and that is the problem I encountered while in Europe. 

The teacher wanted my left leg fully lengthen while I could not, then he did not understand that usually I do, but not this time. So he came and force me to use the full capacity of my left leg, which was already in pain. I did not stay quiet, I talked to him but it seems that he did not get my point.

For instance, I know that I won't have that problem with Iain. 

So as they say "One teacher, one student". At the beginning I did not like the idea and the more I am practicing the more I understand that point.

Have a good practice!

Namaste,

Ashtanga Yoga Practice - Improving the core

Since I don't have anything else to do while I am in Thailand I am starting to practice 4 hours per day. After my morning practice I usually go for a swim to relaxe my muscle and in the afternoon I start exploring other path outside of Ashtanga.

For instance I am now practicing Pilates, I really missed that practice, I used to practice and teach Pilates when I was living in Paris 5 years ago. I do miss it a lot but I am getting back to it which is a very good news.

Steve Hyland let me borrowing the Yoga Wheel from the studio, and I am discovering how can I use it instead of a Ball or instead of a Reformer for instance. It is pretty intense practice and I am realising that I kind of lost my core by only practicing Ashtanga Yoga.

Or maybe it is because I do not practice well, but Pilates moves are essentially for the core muscle. The passage from lying down to the Teaser is slightly difficult with this manduka travel yoga mat.

Very thin and my sacrum does not like it, therefore I am not stable because of the pain it occurs to my sacrum.

And as a result this morning I did my first "baby lolasana, I was very happy about it but was unable to reproduce it ;-)

So now I am looking forward to the next morning practice.

Have a good day!

Practice with Steve Hyland, Asthanga Yoga Pattaya

This morning I have started practicing under the guidance of Steve Hyland.

He is not a famous "Ashtangi" still he is certified, he has been practicing  with Richard Freeman and Hamish Hendry.

He has installed his Yoga Shala in Pattaya Thailand, a place well known for the night life and "local" girls. However I have absolutely no regret because Steve he's extremely well qualified.
From a purely physical and external point of view, my practice was not the most aesthetic nor the lightest but from a purely introspective point of view it was revolutionary.

I did listen my body and my breathing pattern, respect all aspect of my body and did not push anything too far or not enough. I was in tune with myself and it was probably the very fist time it happens to me.

The end of the year has been slightly uncomfortable and my body took the hit. During my last day in Mysore I had a nice talk with Trupta and explained him something that happened to me the day before: "As I was walking back home I suddenly started thinking of one heating argument I had before and others stuffs... then I start having such a huge pain in my left knee that I walked back home limping".

Past and present emotions can be so powerful they can impact our body and well being. I knew it before but I never really measured it to that extend.

Knees represent the refusal to yield, to bend, to obey, to submit.

While I was walking the thought that came up to my mind was an argument I had during which someone was telling me what kind of clothes I should wear in order to  be "more respectable in India", then the feeling of working for a cause that I did not share and the lack of integrity.

Introspection

I then realised that working on the external side was not properly useful unless we have no idea of what is happening deep inside of us. That is the one of the most difficult thing we have to face as human being and practitioner, do we really take time to understand our inner self? Are we really willing to do this personal work?

It seems that everyone wish to take care of themselves, that is one one of the reason why Yoga has become so popular.

Yoga is "healing". That is what social networks are saying with all "yogis" posting beautiful filtered pictures in crazy postures including spiritual sentences to caption that moment.

I am not bitter but I am becoming tired of it. The more I am practicing the more I understand that it is not the journey at all. The more I am travelling looking for teachers with who I can practice and evolve the more I understand and realise that I do not know myself and furthermore I never ever let myself to blossom fully.

Home is not a place where I will buy nice furniture in order to be happy, lately I finally understood it. I agree in some way I am very lucky to be able to travel but it is a choice that I have done and now my quest is knowing me better in order to teach what I found on my special quest.

That is only through that particular path that I am able to practice Yoga. Being able to declare that I have read the Sutras and understood the Upanishad and the Gita in order from time to time to place on of these sentence below a picture of myself performing the full wheel is not for me.

You can not buy wisdom, you can not find wisdom in a book and no one can teach what wisdom is.
Being grounded is the very first thing to learn and to practice, that what we should look for.

Making peace with ourself before making peace with others, mastering our emotions.

Being able to understand that we are not what we thought.

Being able to be alone in order to do introspection.

Introspection is a powerful tool, we should allow ourself to it.

Namaste
More articles here: XandraYogaBlog

Stop bending the knees!

When your hamstrings are too short.

The truth rely on practice. You can read a Yoga book where all asanas will be well described with the "perfect" alignment and recommendation such as "bending your knees when your hamstrings are too short....".

I have been instructed to do so by some teachers, I have read it on several books, I have seen it during yoga practice and unfortunately I have been doing it and teaching it as well.....

Then when I started to practice with Iain Grysak he told me not to fold my knees in all forward fold (standing and sitting).

I was surprised.... 

But I listened to him and from that day my all practice drastically changed.

All my forward fold were actually folding deeper, the huge pain I used to have on the back of my legs started to disappear while my upper body was getting straighten and my lower back wide open.

I understood something, for instance in Padanghustasana the "goal" (if there was any achievement to it) was not to keep the chest on the knees or lower, it was simplest, just bend forward and the body will adjust to it.

The goal was not to go into one asana in particular with a specific way but more about becoming the asana itself with the actual ability.

Anatomically speaking we can not give or judge a proper alignment for one asana as everyone has a different body type.

Therefore there is no "your hips has to be facing that way on a sagittal plane and this is the last word", absolutely not. It is okay to have the hips slightly unaligned, it is okay to have a rounding back.

What is happening when we are bending the knees while forward folding?

In order to bend the knees we have to use the hamstrings as they are in charge of bending the legs. While bending, hamstrings are getting shorter so they are not stretching. 

What is a forward fold?

Mainly it is a stretch of the back of the legs and lower back, actually it is stretching the all posterior part of the body.

If the hamstrings are too short and not flexible while bending forward it can become uncomfortable, so to ease the movement automatically we want to bend the legs..... by bending them we are not stretching them.... so basically not solving any issue regarding their flexibility. 

A tight hamstrings does not help the lower back neither. Sometimes we think we are protecting our lower back by bending the legs while we are not.

Of course if there is any hyper extension of the knee it is advisable to slightly bend it. We should not work with a "locked" knee.

Enjoy your practice!

- Namaste -

The "laws" of Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga

The practice of the Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga is a very personal journey. It is a commitment, a silent contract signed between You and You only. No one will be knocking at your door every morning and wake you up for the practice. Only you are responsible for this action of "Tapas".

There will be a lot of frustration about yourself: Why I can not do the asana and how long will I be stuck here? When will I be "upgraded" and given a new asana?

And also a lot of frustration toward your Teacher: Why he is not helping/adjusting me? Is he only noticing me? Why does he let this student doing more asana when he can not catch? Does he really know my practice?

At one point your body will talk to you. Whether it will be hurting you or might surprising you. Some asanas that were out of reach are now coming easily as others asanas that were easier will become harder to reach. The body intelligence will open new path into your movements by creating more space and developing new muscles.

Your mind will play with you, it will scare you for some asana such as the drop back telling you it is not safe while some others days will let you do whatever your want.

And in the middle of this revolution happening in and outside of your inner Self you will have to remain stable and focus.

There is a dogma about Sharat. Sharat says "this" or "that" and everyone has to follow it blindly. Older well established Ashtangis are not following Sharat but still continue to pay tribute to Pattabhi Jois. Others prefer to follow Manju Jois.

Therefore some teachers will stop you during your practice and some others won't, allowing you to practice with variation. If you practice with Sarawasti she will let you do variation.

Some westerner teachers try to teach such as Sharat. They wear the towel around their waist, speak like Sharat, try to count like Sharat but got lost in the sanskrit counting, teach the led class very fast and even use his tone in order to replicate him the best way they can.

What I have learned lately it that there is not really any "laws" or rules in the Ashtanga as it might be different from one teacher to another one.

There is a story about the fact that "you won't receive any new asana on a Tuesday".... why? no one knows but some like to say it is about the alignment of the planet.

Why there is no practice on Full Moon or New Moon? Some say that it is because your body might be injured during this particular time, some others says that as Pattabhi Jois was also into astrology he took the decision to not teach during this time, no one has a proven or written scientific proof or even in the tradition about why there is no practice during these time.

Why it has to be practice 6 days in a row one day off? The best answer is you always need a day off to rest your body. But there is nothing wrong to practice 5 days in a row 2 days off. Or 2 days in a row, one day off and 2 days in a row. 

Why you can not practice asana with a variation? No one know, some of them are saying is because your body can not fully open if you are using a variation but what about a permanent injury that does not allow the student to go into the asana?

Why you can not practice backbend before the Intermediate Series (outside of the closing series)? It is said that the Primary Series is the preparation of the Intermediate Series. So does that mean that others practitioner of other style of Yoga are doing it wrong?

The most important thing is to practice it in order to understand it and your body. Your body is getting "purified" by a regular practice because it is constantly opening your joints and bringing fresh energy to your body as it is removing all the bad thoughts that can stay printed into your muscles.

The best thing that I am now looking forward to it is to practice it on my own, not in a class completely packed where it is impossible to spread your legs or your arms and to move forward only with myself, not waiting for the approval of any teachers.

What I also learned is that I won't be following blindly any "guru" and won't listen to the so called rules of Ashtanga. I will follow what my heart and body will tell me because I am my own guru.

- Namaste -

Instead of moving forward I am stepping back....

I am back to Ubud to practice with Iain Grysak. This shala is amazing, peaceful, very good energy and mostly I have noticed that same students are coming back and I am one of them.

After the practice Iain asked me about my left side and noticed that my pelvis was not aligned. He suggested me to do half primary but give me the option to continue to practice the entire series if I was feeling good with it.

"Patience" is his word. And I have to admit that he is completely right. There is no point for me going further into the practice while I can not bend on the left side. My body is completely unaligned and even though I am spending more time and bringing more attention to my jump back and jump through (by the way it is clearly improving) the pain is still here and I am still very limited into my movements.

Hamstrings injury can last for 6 months or even more so I have to become patient and respect my body.

When there is not another option patience is the best thing to apply and to agree with.

When I am lengthening my arms in front of me and bringing my 2 index altogether I can see that my left side is shorter than my right side. My body is compensating. For example Navasana is not stable at all, right hip higher than the left one so therefore there is no stability.

Nothing else to say about it. Just Patience.

- Namaste -

Week 2, Day 2, Mark Robberds

Even thought I know my limitation because of my injury I have to admit that sometimes it is really hard to deal with it. All standing poses for instance are completely excruciating, not to mention that the Prasaritta Padotanasana Series that I used to love and practice so much is now completely out of my reach.....

However once passed all Janu shirshana the practice is getting more pleasant.

Supta Kurmasana was effortless, I am binding slowly but easily.

Some of my jump through were flying.

But in the end, after Shavasana I just wanted to cry, I felt alone on my mat, I was watching the practice of others and was wondering when can I reach that level? 

My backbends are really going well, I have so much good things coming out of my practice and I have absolutely no reason of feeling down.

I just want the injury to be heal, quickly... how long will it last??

Anyway, tomorrow is another practice so only good things can come out of it.

- Namaste -

Learning how to practice with my injury - Week 2, Mark Robberds

My injury is getting worst, left sit bone, left hamstring are completely tight, can not bend forward on the left side, however the hip opening is still happening so it does not stop to practice the Marychasana D for instance but all forward fold on the left side are completely out of reach.

This morning after Trikonasana B when I noticed that I could not even reach the floor without bending my left knee I was about to cry.

Then as my practice was going on I realised that it does not stop to me to work my jump back and jump through as well the lifting up.

At one my point I decided to just let it go.

When I reached Bhujapidasana I then realised that even though I did not really control the head down on the floor I've done it without my feet touching the floor, it was such an improvement. However to come back I had to bring the feet on the floor but mostly the work was coming from my arms, so I was very happy.

I also did a beautiful Setu Bandhasana with my arms crossed at my chest without any pain at all, it was actually very easy. Urdhva Dhanurasana was really easy as well.

My drop back were also very good, I come back with my head last and mostly the work is now coming from my legs.

So what am I learning right now?

Okay I have this bad injury but it is just limiting me in some asanas during the forward fold. However I can still improve the rest of the practice and instead of having pity of myself it woke up the warrior in me.

Today I practiced in full consciousness about my limitations and explored more about the things I can actually do but that I never done it fully because I thought it was out of my reach.

It was a full 2 hour practice, taking my time but respecting all vinyasas.

Finally it all happened for a good reason ;-)

- Namaste - 

Day 2 - Ashtanga yoga with Mark Robberds, Canggu

I am learning to practice with pain, my left sit bone is still painful but it is completely manageable. My practice is slower than usual and in order to avoid the pain I am learning how to stretch my left side from different other part of my body. As my forward folds are slightly limited on the left side I try to stretch more from the lower back to gain more space between the sit bone and the lumbar spine. So far it is working.

The practice was good this morning and tomorrow I will start the back bend on my own using the wall, Deepika is showing to students how to use the wall without becoming completely dependant of it.

My jump back and jump through.... how can I put it in words.... yesterday we have an all session about how to reinforce the core center, mostly I knew all exercices but I have to admit that I do not practice them so maybe I should add it to my routine, maybe I should start to add a little session in the afternoon with this kind of exercices.

Mark said that if you want to practice the Ashtanga at one point you have to put the spiritual on the side and to commit only to the movement, becoming more athletic.  Even though I really want to manage the jump back and jump through I never really commit to it, during the practice I am trying my best but never I am practicing it outside of the practice so maybe it is time for me to start the process.

But then it is really confusing as some teachers told that the practice is enough and practicing another session might have side effects such as closing the part of the body your are opening during the morning practice. What is wrong, what is right? I don't know.

I will start a routine in the afternoon with exercices showed as yesterday and will see the effect it will give to my morning practice.

Why we are getting addicted to the Ashtanga Yoga?

There is something about the daily practice, it becomes a ritual. Waking up early going to the shala for the practice.

Ashtanga yoga Shalas are quiet. No one is sitting on his/her mat chatting with other people, talking about how fabulous your yoga pant is, asking what is your yoga mat, laughing loudly, no, all of theses things are not happening in an Ashtanga Yoga Shala.

You just come, unfold your mat, chant (or not) the opening mantra and then ekam inhale and practice starts.

Some days are good some days are really bad, sometimes the body is completely stiff, you have to deal with it, no whining to the teacher "oh why today my body is so stiff?"... everyones knows why, it happens, nothing is static, each day is different, you are different each new day and so the practice will be different.

Changes are happening, you can feel them. As you are practicing daily the same posture you can feel the difference from day 1 to day 250, you can notice that you are going deeper into the asana without any pain and any fear. You gained courage and confidence and you always remember that nothing is achieve, your practice is always in a process of constant changes as well your body as well your breathing.

Even thought sometimes you feel the temptation of comparing yourself to others the more you are practicing the less you do it. Your mat is becoming your world, your own space, you are completely focus.

The reason we are getting addicted to the Ashtanga Yoga is the realisation that everything is possible. When you are comparing your practice from Day 1 to now there are big changes and still going on. You feel that you improve yourself, not only on the physical part but on the mentally part as well. In a way you are making peace with yourself by knowing you better.

It is also a silent connections with others practitioners, at one point you will notice that you are enfolding your mat at the same place, nearby the same practitioner, even thought your flow will be different from him/her there is something that is guiding you toward the same direction. When the yoga shala is full then it is different but when there is plenty of place you will tend to go on the same spot.

Which to me is really funny because I never had "my spot", I used to change a lot but lately I have noticed that I am putting my mat on the very same place.

The same way you silently understand that some places are "booked" even though the practitioner is not there. For instance I will never ever put my yoga mat on the front row or the second row. 

Most of the time when you exchange the first time with a student the first question is "how was your practice today?". We all know how hard it is so we often encourage each others and talking with others brings you some new highlight to your practice.

It is like being in a community but without living altogether all the time. It is a daily 2 hours of practice where we are sharing our energy and to me it is priceless.

My practice this morning was really good, I almost catch on my own in Supta Kurmasana and Iain was behind me, when he saw my fingers touching each others I heard him saying "hey...."... then he stopped because I was not able to catch but he adjusted me...  but silently we both agreed that it is finally coming ;-)

During shirshasana I have noticed that now I don't really let my head touching the floor, without any efforts (well still pushing hard into the shoulders) I can really feel that my head is lifting up, means that I am building strength in my upper  body which is a good news for all my new jump back and jump front that are slowly coming. I am getting better and better into the jump front still heavy in the jump back.

Right now I am considering staying in Bali on July as well. I am supposed to fly to Greece after Mark Robberds workshop but can not find a flight ticket..... I wanted to practice with Kritina Karitinou and I am having a second thought..... 

To be continued :-)